What You Need to Know About Dating Apps
Match.com was the first online dating platform launched in 1995. At the time, the internet had less than 100,000 websites and millions dialed in using a landline to connect to the internet. Nowadays billions connect easily with the invention of advanced digital connections via WiFi, Broadband, DSL, and Cable. Additionally, internet devices are more compact and connect virtually from any country spawning a digital society. Almost all human activities and transactions can now be done online; including dating. It is now very prominent for people to meet and date one another on various website platforms. As time passes by, more people keep embracing the notion of digital dating. Now, over 1500 digital dating platforms have been created and over 40 million Americans use these dating platforms; with a rapid increase in numbers globally. In this article, I will detailedly discuss everything you need to know about dating in the digital world. Let's go!
What is Digital Dating?
Digital dating is also called online dating or internet dating. It simply means using the internet to connect with romantic or casual partners.
Note that online dating cell phone apps and websites are different from social media; although the two concepts are interwoven. Social media is usually used to make and reconnect with friends, but can also be used as a digital dating platform. Conversely, online dating apps or websites are specially designed for meeting new romantic partners.
How to Get Started
If you want to try out digital dating, you need to be prepared and know how to successfully navigate the space. Without adequate preparation, it is easy to get lost in the crowd and struggle to find a suitable match. To get started with, note these guides:
1. Find The Perfect Dating App
To successfully explore digital dating, ensure you use an app that is suitable for your distinct wants and personality.
As our needs and sexual orientation differ, so also do dating apps. You might feel the universe is out to get you when you fail to find a suitable match, even in the vast dating community.
But sometimes, the issue is that you're trying to fit in where you don't belong. More like you're hoping to find a partner by attending a parade for married couples. Apparently such can't work. So, before investing your time and desires in any app, research it. Take your time and choose the perfect app that that matches your unique personality and wants.
2. Your Profile Must Be as Unique as You
On dating sites, the mistake most people make is that their profiles do not accurately highlight their personality. Avoid this. Your profile should be unique, honest and accurately portray everything about you.
So, reduce the filter on your photo as much as you can. Also, your profile picture should be recent, not 10 years old. You can show your date your picture to Paris years ago after you started dating. An overly perfect image might give off a what I ordered vs. what I got effect. And, of course, we know how that will end. Haha.
More so, your profile picture should be simple; make sure the photo is as bare as possible. Oh yes, and most importantly, do not post any image with any landmark or tag that can be traceable to your home or place of work.
3. Keep It Real
Be real. Resist the urge to describe an unreal version of yourself. In a way, online dating is quite similar to the traditional dating style; your confidence can be seen in how you describe yourselves.
Before joining the bandwagon, remember that your perfect match might be looking for someone with a real persona. Being yourself works every time.
4. You Have Not Found Someone Until It Is Official
You can take on multiple apps and talk to as many people as possible simultaneously. No matter how invested you are in talking to anyone there, you are not dating. So, keep your options open. Also, if your chat buddy keeps stalling to meet you in person, it's time to let them go. That person is likely in a dead relationship, in prison, or is an attention seeker, which is someone who finds comfort when acknowledged by others.
5. Rejection Is Not Only Experienced In The Real World
It doesn't matter how great you or your profile looks; rejection is bound to happen. You've got to manage rejections. You won't always fit into the preferences of others, and that's okay. So, the days or months that do not make you feel like the most attractive person are only temporary.
Benefits of Digital Dating
1. Compatible Connections
In traditional dating, you most likely have no idea of the other person's personality before physically meeting. The person's initial charm might get you all excited and hopeful. And in the middle of the date, you are planning your escape. Or the awkward moment that follows after revealing a unique personality trait.
Digital dating avoids all that as much as possible. You'll get to interact without physically meeting. There is already a mutual interest and connection from your looks, sexual orientation, and beliefs. So it creates a comfortable atmosphere and increases the chances of being yourself. Of course, you can then escalate to a physical meeting after establishing some compatible connections online.
2. More Options Beyond Geographic Location
It can be quite frustrating to be stuck only with potential lovers that are within your geographic location. Sometimes it feels like you know them all, and you want to escape their claws.
However, with online dating, you can seamlessly connect with people worldwide. Online dating broadens your horizon and allows you to communicate with people from other cultures and backgrounds. Your soulmate might be in a far away country away waiting for you, so shoot your shot!
3. Screen The Person Before Exchanging Numbers
Imagine that you can meet someone but not precisely meet in person. Then you take your time and get to know each other better, but without encroaching on your personal space and having access to your phone numbers.
And after a while, if the person passes your test, they can have your telephone number. Well, digital dating already provides that luxury. So, you can meet as many people as you want, but keep them at arm's length before you exchange numbers. Terrific!
4. Public Profiles Shows a Bit of Their Personality
The profiles of people show a glimpse of their respective personalities. It helps you in getting a suitable match and allows you to make better choices in selecting who you may want to bond with.
Also, you can conduct a Google reverse search to direct you to their social media handles. This would also give you a broader view of their personality, lifestyle, and family.
5. Preference Might Surprise You - Someone for Everyone
Kick the "my type" notion to the curb. You might think you want a tall, muscular fellow with a lean athletic wrestler body like The Rock (a.k.a. Dwayne Johnson). But sometimes, a person's warm smile and genuine persona are all you need to get you to start your journey to bliss.
6. It Has More Flexible Features
Some apps support video and voice calls; so you can have a better look at potential lovers and also have more effective communication beyond text messages. It also helps you detect body language and can save you from being catfished.
7. It Is Cheap and Convenient
One of the best things about digital dating is that it can be done from the comfort of your bed. You can be matched with as many people as you want, even from your office.
And it does not end there. No physical dates until you are ready! So, no Uber, movie tickets, dinner, or wardrobe expenses. It does not get better than this.
Downsides of Digital Dating
It is a general life phenomenon, whatever has benefits would also have some attendant downsides. These are the downsides of digital dating:
1. You Are Exposed to Military Scam
Military scammers have duped several unsuspecting people via digital dating. They usually pose as the U.S. military serving overseas with fake pictures and documents to back their claims.
They are quick to love-bomb you, so you become blind to the signs. Then for one reason or another, they never have transportation to come back home or need money for health care. They would always find fraudulent excuses to ask you for financial help. You should always report and block such accounts.
2. Green-card Scams
Green-card scam is one of the prevalent scams in the world of digital dating. With their mischievous but meticulous plans, these scammers would play their cunning games to use you in getting a green card.
They aim to marry you for their green card! And even if you do not end up together with them, you end up giving them a reasonable sum of money over time out of love for them. Their main targets are people from developed nations, and these scammers often hail from the third-world and underdeveloped countries.
3. Gold Diggers
If you are about to or are involved in digital dating, you should check out the Netflix Documentary Movie|The Tinder Swinder. This movie will expose you to the prevalence of gold diggers in the digital dating world. Online gold diggers are usually the most unsuspecting. They feign wealthy lifestyles so you would assume they are financially comfortable and don't lack. (remember, things are not always what they seem).
They don't mind spending money on you. They have a bigger game ahead. After they have gained your trust, they would always claim something unfortunate happened that will require you to help them financially. Well, don't! Don't fall for the scam.
4. Information Hijackers/ Stolen Identity
Over 60% of digital dating platforms are vulnerable to identity thefts. Some of the digital media are run by cyber hijackers. You must be sensitive and careful when revealing certain personal information about yourself.
They steal your information using app permissions and other sensitive data they may request from you. Their reverse engineering can steal your passwords, personal pictures, and bank details. So, you need to alway conduct proper research on any digital app before you get started
5. Unwanted Sexual Messages
On digital dating platforms, it is common to see people sending unwanted and explicit naked or semi-naked pictures to one another; without prior consent of the recipient. So, if you are using dating sites, some people may send you sexually explicit text messages, provocative audio clips, suggestive selfies, or videos.
The harassment and unnecessary triggers of unwanted sexual messages is really annoying. Among other consequences, sexual messages could be used to manipulate or harass you in the future.
How to Avoid Being Catfished
Catfish is a term in digital dating used to describe situations where a person uses a fiction online persona to lure/trick another person into a relationship. The intention is usually to scam the catfished individual.
Here are a few guidelines to detecting a catfish.
They constantly avoid doing video calls with you, and their tone of voice is never consistent
There is always an excuse to avoid taking selfies in real-time
They avoid speaking to you on the phone. Chats are their preferred type of communication mode
They are always far away or unable to meet you
They beg for money
Your friends are suspicious of them
They are always too good-looking to be true
Your instincts say so (always trust your instinct).
Digital Dating Safety Tips
After finding someone who deserves to go on a date with you, you must not let your guard down. Here is a compilation of safety tips for your date.
Tell your friends where you are going and notify them of any change in plans
Send the pictures (of the person you are going to meet) to your friends
Meet in a public place that is familiar and comfortable to you
Have enough fares for your transportation. You don't want to get stranded.
Drive or order your Uber yourself
Do not drink alcohol. You need to be in control of your senses. Resist to take even a sip.
Do not spend the night on the first date or the initial few dates.
Try meeting during the day. If your date wants to try something funny ( like rape), you can easily scream for help during day time.
Share your Google location and face time with your friends
Trust your instincts always. There is always that gut feeling that will just subtly let you know if a date is a good fit. You've got to read between the lines and see the red flags.
Conclusion
Digital dating has come to stay, and many people have found the love of their lives online. One of my best relationships was with a person I met online a few years ago; although we've broken up. Happily so. Our connection was a learning lesson. The experiences we shared will never be forgotten. Digital dating has its virtues and vices, as with traditional dating. But, the benefits outweighs the cons. But remember, in your search for your ideal partner, don't forget to have fun. Have lots of fun while at it.